"Where do you wish to sit?"

This question, asked of me at a memorial service at the Church of the Holy Spirit in Lake Forest, Ill., was amazing. It made me feel just like everyone else. It gave me dignity and control. For the first time since I have been using a wheelchair I was asked where I would like to sit - not told where I would be sitting.

What do our church buildings say to people? "Welcome. Join us!" or "Maybe it would be easier for you to go elsewhere"? Accessible doesn't just mean enabling a person to watch what's going on. It means making it possible for every person to become an active participant in worship and in the total life of the church. I stopped singing in a choir when I could no longer get to the choir loft. When I sing with the diocesan convention choir, rehearsals are often on a non-accessible floor. A friend with a hearing impairment recently asked me to remind a visiting priest to turn on his microphone so that she will be able to hear the sermon. We do need to re-think things which we take for granted.

Those making the building decisions need to work with people who have disabilities in determining what changes need to be made. It's clear to me when I visit a church whether changes have been made merely to accommodate parishioners with disabilities or if they have been made to truly welcome people into the life of the church community.

It will be wonderful when those of us with disabilities no longer have to ask, "Is it wheelchair accessible?" or "Will I be able to 'hear' the sermon?" or any of those other questions we still need to ask before visiting a church. What do our church buildings say to people? "Where do you wish to sit?" or "Here's where you may sit, but of course you won't really be able to be a part of us."